Husband Measures, Wife Eyeballs… What Happens when Opposites Join Forces

A Typical Kitchen Encounter

From the living room, my husband asks- How’s the roast doing?

Me- (thoroughly enjoying the bite I just sliced off) Great.

Him- It needs to rest before cutting. What’s the temp.?

Me- Ummm...

I rummage through the drawer for the old-fashioned thermometer and plunk it in the meat. Then drain potatoes, slice a cucumber. Oops, the temperature. I lean over to check. The little red gauge is magically stopped on a number.

And, predictably, here he comes.  Right on time. Spurred by the instinctual urge to obtain a numeric reading.

Him- What is it?

Me- What’s it supposed to be?

Him- 155.

Me- Ummm, it’s about that.

Him- (Eyebrows raised in suspicion) Were you monitoring the temperature?

Me- I kept an eye on it.

Him- With a thermometer? (laughing)

Me- Well, once. But I already knew it was ready. Look at that color. It’s perfect. And the aroma. Here, taste…

Crisp Lab Coats vs. Splattered Aprons

My husband cooks with accuracy and efficiency. A reliable recipe is strictly followed- exact ounces, teaspoons and sprigs combined in an ordered way to produce a predictable reaction. A lab coat would be suitable as he maintains a spotless workspace. Knives sharpened, batteries checked. Nothing gets opened, poked, or tasted until the high-tech thermometer beeps.

When I cook, inspiration flows. There’s a blend of proven techniques, new ideas, my mood, the weather, who’s eating, and ingredients on hand.  Cabinets are open, lids off. Countertops have splatters. So do my clothes. Written instructions would read “a pinch of this”, “a few of that”, “however much you prefer”. I stir frequently, scrutinize the melding process, and taste a lot.

This pretty much summarizes my husband’s approach to, well… most everything in life, and my approach to, well…most things too.

The Good ‘Ol Left-Brain, Right-Brain Theory

Left brain- focused on utility and manipulating the world. It narrows things down to a certainty. It’s logical, analytical, objective. 

Right brain- focused on meaning and connections. It opens things up into possibility. It’s intuitive, creative, subjective.

Measuring, configuring, engineering come naturally to my husband. Solid left-brain tendencies.  

Eyeballing, sensing and crafting feel right to me. Definitely right-brain leaning.

Let’s be clear, we aren’t born holding either a calculator or a paint brush.  Both sides of the brain are active- to some degree, we’re all logical, all creative.

But most of us seem to gravitate toward one approach.

The left brain and right brain may process information differently but they communicate and collaborate constantly. What a perfect arrangement.

There’s Value in Understanding Your Polar Opposite

A thousand and one times my husband and I have caught ourselves approaching life from opposite hemispheres.

Way back in those early days (I’m talking decades ago), it attracted and charmed us. It also baffled and sparked debate.

Now, we appreciate the advantages of daily life with a polar opposite.  

Our differences are amusing. They enliven. They open our minds to new ways and humble us when our narrow approach isn’t the best one.

Mostly, though, we know our collaboration leads to amazing results.  

Let us Dine at a New Kitchen Table 

Last week we went to a furniture store that had a table I’d seen online.

Me- Here it is. I like it even better in person.  I sit in a lovely chair.  

He walks around, bends down, looks underneath.  

Him-See this wobble (shakes table). It’s not made well. And the hardware is cheap.

Indulging him, I bend down and feel the cheap hardware, which seems normal to me.

-I don’t think it will fit. That nook area is awkward with the low windows.  Did you measure it?

I give my most exaggerated clueless stare.  

Him- (laughing) Don’t worry, honey. I measured before we left.

He pulls a tape measure out of his pocket and stretches it across the table.

Him- Yea. See, this is too wide. About 2 inches off.

Me- What? No.

Him- Yea. You won’t have room between the chairs and the windows.

He walks over to a different table and starts the examination process.

Him- This would work. It’s oblong.

Me- The light stain on that one would clash with our cabinets.

Him- It would?   

Me- Yes. And the style is too modern.

Him- Really?

Me- Plus the chairs are clunky.

Him- They’re sturdy. See the hardware?  

We laugh.

The Advantage of Joining Left and Right

Two inches too wide, two shades too light… we leave the store empty-handed.

But not discouraged.

Because we know both sides of the spectrum working together will find the perfect table that fits the awkward space and compliments the style of our house.

When you pool your resources, partnership can accomplish things in far more interesting ways.

And when we finally get a table, we’ll sit and feast on a delicious meal that was either prepared in a lab coat or a splattered apron.